Doughnuts taste better then skinny feels, burger king tastes better then skinny feels. I could literally name 10 foods in a second that taste better then skinny feels, so whoever came up with that line is an out an out liar!
I’m not saying that being healthy and slim doesn’t feel good, but if in competition with a chocolate fudge cake, well i know which one I’d choose. (The latter, just incase it needs clairty).
So my friend has a mantra, it goes a bit like this “Food is life” and i whole heartedly agree! Who doesn’t love food?, i really don’t trust the people who say they eat to live. Wtf? How boring must your life be if you can’t get enjoyment from a bacon sarnie.
I live to eat, so naturally i wanted to talk about my favourite subject. Anything food related is up there on my list of priorities.
I’ve always been fat since a tiny toddler and i had the rolls to prove it and the pictures. I loved food and I’ve battled with my weight and my need for taste sensations all my life. I’m not bitter about it, it is what it is, but i do envy those skinny bitches that can eat what they like and still have the body of Jennifer Aniston. So unfair! I’ve always eaten a lot, i dont give much attention to portion control. I’m one of those people who will use a whole packet of pasta for one person because it just never looks enough in the saucepan. I’m known in my area, actually not just my area pretty much any towns within a 5 mile radius by all the takeaways. (Shameful) I love a good takeaway because 1. I’m lazy and hate cooking and 2. Because they just taste soooo good. I was known for getting a chinese and a kebab every week, on a good week i could even be known to stretch to an indian. Always the same order, god forbid i tried something different and didn’t like it, what the hell would i do for dinner then? Crisp were my down fall. When i was younger (18) i went on a night out, got shit faced, came home with the munchies. The next morning my sister opened my bedroom door to find me sprawled across my bed in a sorry state, with empty hula hoop packets all over the floor. A multi pack! Gone! And you know what, i didn’t even care. I still don’t care what other people think. This is my life!
Most people say they have a certain kind of relationship with food – they eat because their sad, they eat because their happy blah blah. I dont have that excuse, i eat because some foods just taste to damn nice to say no to. Its that simple.
I was never that bothered about my weight over the years, sure i’d look in the mirror sometimes and not like what i see, sure i’d look at clothes and think how nice it would be to wear them, but then i’d shove a choclate twist in my mouth and life would be good again, those thoughts gone. That all changed though last year…
I joined slimming world for the first time, i enjoyed it, even the happy clappy group. You know the stories you hear about them, how everyone sits round telling you about their week and how they lost 2.5lb in a day? All true! The skit from Peter Kays stand up, when he talks about the lady who came to group sayin how good her week had started but then had a fry up and it all went tits up. All true! But its nice knowing your not on your own, and having someone check your weight every week makes you realise; you cant keep lying to yourself about those 3 biscuits you had before lunch, or the few cubes of chocolate you had before bed and forgot to syn because the only person who will suffer is you. However last year it didnt last very long, i lost nearly 2st in a couple of months, i felt great but apparently not great enough because i started getting back into old habits; eating out 2 times a week, not synning anything, going out drinking. Then xmas came and the temption of those extra pigs in blankets and then the Quality streets staring at me saying “eat me”and i put it all back on and then some.
Its been like that ever since, i’ve been loving life and food! Being at uni is the worst, surrounded by amazing food which is so cheap, with everyone else eating around you is hard to resist. But just over a month ago i decided again enough was enough and so i’ve gone back to slimming world, back to the happy clappy group, back to counting syns and worrying about the slightest thing i put in my mouth. Ive lost 12lb so far so things are going good and i hope i keep it up this time. Its not about being slim for me, its about being healthy and how i feel when im not eating crap. I’ve got more energy, I’m not having afternoon naps and being late to collect my daughter from school (true story), I’m sleeping better getting 6 hours a night instead of the usual 3 (thats a work in progress) and i just genuinely feel better about life.
My life is still overun with food and not a day passess when i don’t want to go buy a multi pack of twirls and eat them in one sitting. I often text my friend telling her how im starving and could murder a burger and sometimes i have one. So shoot me. Food is still life but has a different meaning for me now.
Anyway thats a little bit about me and one of my favourite things. I’m off now to look up the syns in a bloody hot chocolate, is nothing sacred! I still believe everything does taste better then skinny feels but I’ll let you know if im still saying that when im a size 8. (In my dreams)